caa christmas partay.

a personal fav of mine.

thank you henri.

"If we think that a little praying can’t do any harm, we will soon find that it can’t do much good either.  Prayer has meaning only if it is necessary and indispensable.  Prayer is prayer only when we can say that without it, we cannot live."

- Henri Nouwen

Recap, sgraceking style.

in honor of my fellow intern, roommate, namesake, and friend who often writes books instead of blog entries, enjoy:

Tuesday night, I get a text from a friend asking if I want to go to the batting cages with her and her sis tomorrow.  Work was crazy last week.  Tuesday, I was a trying to finish up loose ends before I headed out for prayer and planning Friday.  As such, I thought I couldn’t go see little Paige (said friend).  But, it was Paige’s birthday Wednesday (11/30), and I love the batting cages.  Actually, Paige taught me the ways of loving the batting cages.  In fact, we once drove from Winder to Athens in the snow due to a crazy trip to a cage.  But, we got a ballin’ tee out of it.  And, I thoroughly enjoyed the experience – wondering if we would make it up a hill covered with snow and driving 35 mph down Hwy 316.  Regardless, I ended up going to the cages on Wednesday and I was so thankful.  So refreshing to see that kid.  Also, to hear her speak some words of truth.  Namely, how God can redeem brokenness and insecurities and lost time.

Redeemable.

Friday, I traversed to Athens and dreamed.  The “no strings attached” dreams.  It was a lot of fun (check out my newsletter for more info).  Sat in the botanical gardens (one of my fav places to sit and read and think and pray) and wrote and wrote and wrote.  I spent most of the afternoon there, just writing and thinking and dreaming.  The sun starting its descent, the cold was coming, and I knew my time there was drawing to a close.  The thought hit me:  what if god is a really crazy good god and orchestrates my life for something incredibly awesome?  What “my dreams really did come true?”  Decades from now, I think I might ball my eyes out and stand amazed.  At his goodness.  That he really does have plans to prosper (Smacdonald).  Time will tell.  And, in many respects, it has already…

I relocated to Two Story (eastside), as Cups was my second home for much of my last year at UGA (Summers).  Ran into some camp friends, young and old.  Continued the dreaming process.  Felt alive while chatting with a chick I hadn’t seen in a few months.  Had planned on staying the night with my aunt and uncle who live in Athens.  So, I headed that way around 11:00 pm.  On the drive out there (they have a house a bit outside the city), I popped in a CD I hadn’t listened to in quite some time – Sean McConnell.  I go in phases where I really like that guy.  Other times, his voice and sound annoys me.  But, one of his songs hit home with me again.   The night was clear and I was driving in the country with no one of the road, just a jamming to the tunes.  His story of redemption hit hard with me.  I have been thinking of redemption ever since my convo with little Paige Wednesday.  In that song (“If These Walls Could Speak”), he sings about a dream of him going back to his home as a child.  He sings about the memories of his parents, siblings, and himself in that house.  Please excuse his French. 

            “In this dream of childhood memories some I never will forget, some I might as well. 

            Well most of them have happy endings, some of them still burn like hell.” 

I was contemplating a friend and the crap that she has been through.  And, I hate it for her.  It sucks.  It hurts like hell.  Pardon my French.  Parts of my life suck.  They aren’t pretty and I don’t like looking back on them.  But, it doesn’t end there though.  God redeems. 

            “So to the living room I went, to where my sisters used to sing,
            Used to get on my last nerve now I’d give anything just to see them there again, 
            Dancing like they used to do, spinning circles holding hands until I’d break on through.

            Well I woke up when I heard a shout, ‘Ain’t it beautiful how life turned out?’”
Ain’t it beautiful how life turns out?  Honestly though.  I can get frustrated about how things aren’t this or that.  But, isn’t it beautiful how god redeems things if we let him?  I was thinking what if God redeemed all of my “mistakes” and choices and sin for his glory?  What if he even used them to accomplish some of my dreams?  That would be crazy.  What if I let him do it?

Broken.  

Saturday morning, I woke up early and had a lovely breakfast with the aunt and uncle.  My uncle and I started working on my car – figuring out what needed to be fixed and such as it recently passed the 60k mile mark.  We went out to grab sparkplugs at the store and put those in before I saw little Paige for lunch.  I pulled out of their driveway and was overwhelmed.  The goodness of our God.  What if he really does care about me and delight in me and have good for me?  Peace.  I love going to my aunt and uncle’s house – seeing the stars, chilling in the beauty of the country, playing with their yellow lab, and fixing my car equal shalom to me.   Mmmmmm.  It felt good. 

Today (Wednesday, 12/7), we travelled to Athens for a camp recruiting event.  In the car ride, Jen (our custome service pro) had a few questions for us.  I thought this was going to be the traditional tell me what you think about our database, how could we program better, or let’s debrief ______.  Not the case today.  She is currently thinking through the overall environment of camp and trying to make it more peaceful and homey and shalom.  So, she asked, “where do you feel shalom?”  All six of us in the car answered.  Many variations.  Some similarities.  Nature.  Vacation spots.  Conversations with good friends.  Deep connections with folks.  Stillness.  Shalom.  I was reminded again of the shalom I felt this weekend.  Man.  It was good.  Not just the physical rest.  But, the emotional and spiritual rest of being with the Lord.  Even telling him my dreams and heart desires.  Good conversations with friends.  Silence.  Time alone. 

Jen’s next question, “what do you love about camp?”  I have actually been thinking about that this week.  I can’t put my finger on where or what for, but I was thinking about how much I love camp, specifically during the summer.   We all answered once again.   I couldn’t put that feeling into words, so I said what I knew.

In the spring of 2009, I was contemplating coming back to Camp All-American after my first summer.  I was chatting at the SLC with some old camp friends, trying to see what they were doing for the summer.  One friend Brandt told me I should for sure come back.  He was.  When I asked why, he said: “At camp, you live like you’re supposed to live.  You are sharing the gospel with folks nearly every day.  Folks are pouring into you.  You are in deep community with other believers.  That’s how the Christian life is supposed to be.”  He convinced me.   I haven’t missed a summer since. 

So, I told the folks in the car this exchange between Brandt and myself.  They were blown away.  Stephen, in his grand way of phrasing and putting words into things well, said:  “That is really good insight.  It is how we were made to live.  Sharing the gospel. Living in community.  Worshipping together.  Working alongside folks you know deeply.  Studying the Bible.  Getting poured into.  Being prayed for.  Praying for and knowing others.  And, it is a taste of perfection.  Of heaven.  Of how things should be.”  Well said sir.  I love the summer for those reasons.  There is something special that takes place.  A taste of something to come.  A taste of shalom, if you will. 

Fully Restored.

Been a good week, I'd say…

four things.

four things have transpired worth noting in the past few weeks:

1. at ARK, the kids were sitting down in a circle and one kid piped up: “Did you really ride your bike to Florida?”  Then ensued a five minute conversation about Ride for Christ.  Just the bike ride part though.
2. also at ARK, an encouraging conversation occurred with a freezing parent. learned about her masters degree in organic chemistry.  the differences between universities in the states and in india.  she thanked us for playing with her kids.  at the other apartment complexes where they live, they haven't had anything like ARK.  so good for the kids to get together, meet new friends, play games, and just have fun.  Her kids love it and cannot wait for Thursday.
3. a kid (4th grader, maybe) walked in our office and gave us a check for $600.  he apparently does this every year.  he gives his birthday money to the camp all-american scholarship fund, a program to help underprivileged kids come to camp.  
4. a guy from india came to look at our ropes course.  stephen (from our office), met steve (the indian guy) at a sports ministry conference earlier last month.  and, since steve has family in atlanta, he decided to drop by.  steve owns a gym and is thinking about building some sort of ropes course in his town in india.

dynamite.

Ran across this while processing the bridge conference today:

"I know men; and I tell you that Jesus Christ is not a man. Superficial minds see a resemblance between Christ and the founders of empires, and the gods of other religions. That resemblance does not exist. There is between Christianity and whatever other religions the distance of infinity.

His religion is a revelation from an intelligence which certainly is not that of man. The religion of Christ is a mystery which subsists by its own force, and proceeds from a mind which is not a human mind. We find in it a marked individuality, which originated a train of words and actions unknown before. Jesus is not a philosopher, for His proofs are miracles, and from the first His disciples adored Him. Alexander, Caesar, Charlemagne, and myself founded empires; but upon what foundation did we rest the creations of our genius? Upon force! But Jesus Christ founded His upon love; and at this hour millions of men would die for Him."

- Napoleon Bonaparte

three months.

it's december first.  three months.  so much has transpired.  i cannot even begin to describe.  hilarious.  amazing.  stressful.  busy.  stretching.  i'm a quarter of the way done with this internship.  can't wait to finish the rest of it.  

at ark today, i thought of how grateful i am for the relationships with the kids.  they are chatter-boxes these days.  they trust us and are themselves around us now.  neat to see.  more so, i like how the lord is using this time.  even if it is to just use the time to build community among the kids who live there.  i think the lord has big plans for this program though.  i pray and ask that he would continue to work.  that we could share his name there... 

tonight, i am taking my test for my theology class.  might be a long night.  ha.  typical samchok.  tomorrow, i am headed to athens for a much needed prayer and planning day.  to spend some time dreaming and listening to the lord.  excited about it am i.  pray for me.  that i could listen.  and, not be too scared to dream.  

been a good ride.  thank you once again to all of you.  those who have sacrificed money and time.  those who just love and care about me.  it means a lot...